Wednesday, June 16, 2010

what's your formerly??

so, what's your formerly?

what's a formerly, you wonder?

it's just what you used to be
once you've reached the intersection of
too old to be young & too young to be old.

which is where stephanie dolgoff & so many of us seem to be.

stephanie, a contributing editor at parenting magazine, launched a blog - - that has turned into a book - my formerly hot life: dispatches from just the other side of young [coming in august] - & is quickly becoming a movement. observe:

even though stephanie used the rather cliched "hot" umbrella for her blog/book/movement's identity, she's quick to note that this "formerly transformation" is only partly about looks:

"[T]he shift was much more profound.

And wonderful. The longer I spent on this side of young, the clearer it became that Formerly Territory was a much happier place to live, for me and the hundreds of women I spoke to about it. There are distinct upsides to being a Formerly, ones that no one talks about. I used to feel like a composite of other people’s opinions of me; now, I am comfortable with who I am, and other people’s opinions are, well, just their opinions. I follow my instincts, what’s comfortable for me, rather than what I think I 'should' do or what everyone else seems to think is the move. Life feel less intense, less dramatic, more relaxed and peaceful. In other words, time passes. Things change. And that’s cool.

Except when it’s not. Getting older, even if you’re not old, can sometimes suck! I’m not going to tell you that I welcome every wrinkle and pucker as a symbol of the rich and wise life my trusty body and I have lived happily together. I am regularly shocked by the new iteration of me that stares back from the mirror. I promise never to tell you that you must 'embrace your life changes,' that 50 is the new 40 is the new 30 is the new 29. You are what you are, but you don’t always have to be smiling about it.

On balance, though, even as I’m letting go of the stuff I thought was indispensable to happiness when I was younger, I’m happier than my younger self ever could have imagined."

so, what's your formerly??

image source:

1 comment:

Susan K. Morrow said...

I'd label myself "Formerly Insecure (about my appearance)". I'm so much happier with my overall appearance now than I ever was under age 30 or even 35. I look back at pictures and can now appreciate how "hot" I really was, but I didn't feel it. I love being in my 40s and feeling so much more like myself. And that's why I like to work with LoCAs--Ladies of a Certain Age!