she's so fine at 49.

I've always liked Valerie Bertinelli. As younger sister Barbara, she was my favorite on the One Day At a Time (I was a younger sister, too). I thought it was cute how she and Eddie Van Halen had matching hairstyles (I married a musician, too). She sort of lost me with the whole naming her son Wolfgang thing (I like Mozart as much as the next person, but come on), but she got me back a couple of years ago when she put her weight issues out there and began her partnership with Jenny Craig (I went the Weight Watchers route, but still, we both lost the lbs.).

So I've always related to my pal Val, at some parallel-universe kind of level. But with her latest project, Valerie has graduated to a level I'd love to relate to, but I'm a little too wowed just now to put a plan together.

Valerie will turn 49 on April 23rd, and to celebrate, she engaged a personal trainer and subsequently posed in a bikini for the latest cover of People magazine. And she's slammin!'

So the way I see it, I've got seven years to further step up and pare down. And meanwhile, I propose renaming it the Berti-kini.